Monday, May 3, 2010

For awhile, at least, I will try to commit to words some thoughts that matter. I may not always transfer them to this blog, but I will try to articulate something that matters to me.

I need to understand something about myself; how can I have such a horribly bad temper and be such an absolutely miserable son-of-a-bitch, saying things that ought never be uttered to another human being?

How can that same son-of-a-bitch, just hours later, feel overwhelming emotion and empathy for someone else to the point of being in tears?

If I am ever to write what I want to write, I have to understand those two people who live under my skin.

2 comments:

Me, You, or Ellie said...

When you understand all the different personalities living under your skin, and you figure out a way to make everybody get along, will you let me know?

Ellie

bev said...

It's been my experience that being under a lot of stress can turn a nice person into a monster. I'm usually a very kind, polite person, but after Don's death, there were times when it was almost like I had Tourette's Syndrome as upsetting things would cause me to fly off the handle. Fortunately, my dog, Sabrina, was pretty tolerant of the outbursts. As the old line goes, "..but I'm feeling much better now."