Today's light was feeble and drawn, though not like the dull gloom of an overcast day. It was as if the sun were ill or peaking from behind celestial curtains the color of old tea stains on worn beige sheets. It shone from clear skies, but the sun's light lacked its usual bursting grin. The sky was blue, but it was dull and listless and the sun didn't quite seem to be in the same dimension as the sky. They were two dimensional and delicate and they looked oddly artificial.
I'm having trouble describing what, to some, may have been utterly imperceptible. How does one explain an almost invisible variation in the way the sun not only looks, but feels? If no one else sees it, is it really there to see? If no one else experiences it, was there anything to experience? I may be crazy, but I say "yes," but with my obligatory warning not to believe any such thing.
Can a boiling, gaseous ball of white hot light experience something akin to a human emotion? Can it somehow perceive the universe around it and its place in that universe and the fact that its time is limited? My brain and my beliefs argue firmly and with conviction against such an impossibility. I don't believe it. It's nonsense, just like the nonsense in which we humans routinely engage when we attribute human characteristics and human frailties to trees or the wind or our own idols.
I may have been the only one to notice that the sun was showing signs of age today, but that's not my problem and it's not my fault. I saw what I saw.
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The sun shines a bit different each day. It too has a shelf life, but apart from that, it's mostly the changes and particles in our atmosphere that make the sun's light, warmth and appearance seem different. There are bright, dull, crisp, hot and muted days of sun. I see it differently all the time.
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