Monday, September 8, 2008

American Geezolo

An elderly sister-in-law, who lives in Boston, turned 55 today. I asked her via email how it felt to be 55, since I could have no way of knowing how it feels to be so old. She responded that it didn't feel good and that I wouldn't like it. So, when I turn 55 next month, I'm going to try to avoid noticing. Actually, you'd never know she is 55; she behaves like a 30-year-old. That's probably why I like her.

A brother turns 60 tomorrow. He won't communicate with me, so I can't ask him how it feels to turn 60. But maybe I'll wish him a happy birthday nonetheless.

None of this matters, of course. If the populace of the United States of America behaves as I'm afraid they will in November, it won't matter how old I am. I'm going to run away; I'll leave the U.S.A. for destinations unknown. While I still have a chance. I could go to Iceland and live off of puffins I catch in nets. Or to the Pacific coast of Mexico and live off of fish I catch on hooks. Or to Russia and live off caviar I catch in the back of long black limousines filled with vodka and rich, seductive Russian women looking for excitement with an American Geezolo.

Where the hell did that come from?

6 comments:

YourFireAnt said...

This made me laugh out loud. Thanks, Geezolo!

FA

bee said...

i echo this sentiment. at least, i was born in a different country and still have a place to live there. that country has its own problems, but killing people for oil is not one of them.

Ellie said...

I'm going to Mexico. It may be fucked up, too, but at least it's warm.

BlackenedBoy said...

What does that mean, that your sister-in-law behaves like a thirty-year-old?

It made me laugh, because thirty seems to me like an age by which you have to be settled and mature, yet evidently it means youthful and carefree to you.

I'm sorry about your brother. My father and his brother are like that, too, haven't talked in years, and they refuse to make any attempt at reconciliation.

It's such a waste.

So far as your sentiments concerning the election; I, too, have been dwelling on this extensively, and am actually planning a post relatively soon on the topic of a potential Obama loss.

It would be unspeakable.

Yet, instead of immigrating elsewhere, what if we as a people (we being the liberal sector of American society) simply broke off to form our own nation?

I think that you would be surprised how much separatist spirit there is in the country, and how much could very easily be stirred up in the North in the event of Obama's defeat.

For many reasons, which I will detail in the post, I think that secession is a possible and even viable idea.

I'm being serious.

KathyR said...

Don't tell me. Puffins taste like chicken...

Springer Kneeblood said...

I love all your comments. Thanks for leaving them!

John