A Facebook Pileup

Under the guise of another persona, I am in the midst of discovering that there is a reason I am something of a loner who is not blessed with dozens or even hundreds of close friends.

I have decided that, if I really wanted many other people (including casual acquaintances who decided to befriend me) to know exactly what I was doing at any given moment, I would prefer telling them individually instead of publishing my every movement and every thought to the Internet.

Facebook and Twitter are unquestionably useful tools (or toys) for many purposes, but they are not appropriate add-ons to my semi-reclusive lifestyle. Once one "tweets" with Twitter and accepts exposure on Facebook, though, it's a little tough to withdraw. It's especially tough when one's clients have begun to notice the Facebook persona.

I'm now trying to figure out whether it's possible for a Facebook persona to be badly injured in an Internet accident, thus providing an out for me. I've considered posting this news flash on my Facebook site:

The lifeless virtual body of [Facebook persona] was extricated from a multi-personality pile-up on Facebook today, after an heroic effort by Facebook first-responders to get through the tangle of awkward posts and ignored friend requests. According to Facebook Fire and Rescue, "There was nothing we could do. By the time we made our way over the cluttered Newsfeed, shattered Status Updates, Pokes, Super Pokes,and People You May Know, there was virtually nothing left. Even the Tom Waits Magical Trunk was hidden under a pile of Shared Links. It was ugly." [Facebook persona] is survived by 'Innocent When You Dream,' 'The Dress She Never Wore,' and 'A Tattooed Tear.'

The problem, of course, is that such an ending would not only get rid of the posts from unwelcome clients and extremely casual acquaintances, it would eliminate the posts and Pokes from my blogger friends. So, I'm still deciding what to do. Maybe a new persona is in the offing.